ST. GEORGE TRIP & TATUMS FIRST TIME SWIMMING

I'll Love You Forever

Lately I've been reading books to Tatum each night before she goes to bed. At one of my baby showers people brought books in place of cards, and I have loved having all of these books to read to her. One of my favorites has been Love You Forever by Robert Munsch. It tells a story of a mother that as her son grows up, no matter how old he is, after he is asleep she sneaks into his room and rocks him while singing:

I'll love you forever

I'll like you for always

As long as I'm living

My baby you'll be

Although it's a little strange that in the book the mother drives to her grown sons house in the middle of the night to rock and sing to him, it made me realize something. As much as I wish I could keep Tatum little enough to stay in my arms forever, where I can be the one to protect her from the world around her, she has to grow up. And as hard as it is, I have to let her. I have to let her make her own decisions, I have to let her learn from her mistakes, and sometimes those mistakes are going to bring her pain and sorrow. But as her mother I will still have a role to play. Although I won't be able to protect her from it all, I will love her through it all. No matter what. Love truly is the greatest gift you can give.

An update of pictures!!

Tummy time

Bath time with dad.

Sick baby means extra snuggles!

She LOVES this thing. 

Our family Halloween party, we were bikers!

I spy with my little eye...

Uncle Justin's football game. 

Fall in all it's Glory

The weather this weekend was phenomenal!! Perfect weather for walks and football games. We had a good time at Justin's football game and just being outside enjoying it before it's gone. Fall always comes and goes too quickly. 

Happy Four Months!!

 Tatum is now four months old!!! I am loving this age so much. She is starting to like toys and grab things. She loves to watch football and is starting to laugh a lot. One of my favorite things lately is during her last feeding I lay down and feed her on our bed. After she's done she always gazes up at me and will just sit there staring at me. And then I tell her over and over again how much I love her, and each time I say it, she gives me the biggest smile. Of course that is always followed by a million kisses on squishy cheeks. Then I'll hold her little arms and say a prayer with her. Can't think of a better way to end my day, she fills my heart with so much joy.

Gahh I love those tootsies...

Is your baby sleeping through the night?

If I could only count how many times people have asked me.. "Is she sleeping through the night?" It's like a measurement of how good of a mom I am. I swear it's always the first question people ask me. And people seem to make you feel like if your baby isn't sleeping through the night by a couple months old then you must be doing something wrong. And the moms whose babies do sleep through the night seem to plaster it all over Facebook etc. (nothing wrong with that, I'd be pretty stoked about it too) but it always made me feel like I was doing something wrong.

I started noticing that the more pressure I put on myself to get her to "sleep through the night", the more frustrated I would get with my sweet Tatum. And when she'd wake up in the night I would always think what is wrong, why won't you just sleep through the night like all the other babies? Until I finally came to realize it's NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL FOLKS. Once I actually thought about it, I realized I was more frustrated with the fact that I wasn't meeting these expectations than I was with the lack of sleep or getting up with her in the night. Once I took that pressure off of myself, I was so much happier. I'm not saying that sleep training your baby is bad, I think it's completely awesome and necessary. I'm also not saying that I will never let my baby "cry it out" etc. What I'm simply saying is, can we all just go a little bit easier on ourselves? I mean, I get woken up by the sweetest baby in the whole world. And it only gives me more opportunities to snuggle her. I feel like I spent a lot of those opportunities frustrated instead of fully enjoying something that I will NEVER get back. I will get my sleep back, but never those moments. She's already a day older today than she was yesterday. And I practically can't even say those words without choking up. 

I'm sure there will come a time where I will need to show some tough love, let her cry it out, or maybe once I have another baby I won't be able to get up in the night like I have been able to with Tatum. But for now I am content. I have my sweet little baby and I'm always going to do what I think is best for her and what is best for me. I strongly believe that every mother has a different way of doing things and every baby is different too, making it impossible to make a blanket statement about how things should be done. But isn't that what is so beautiful about being a mother? YOU are the one that knows what is best for you and your baby, mothers intuition is no joke. And I thank Heavenly Father every day that he trusted me enough to send me my sweet Tatum, now can I just learn to trust myself? I'm sure there will come a day where I will get a full 8 hours of sleep, but for right now I'm going to take the extra snuggles. 

Conference Weekend

This really is my absolute favorite time of year. I love everything about fall and I especially love General Conference time. It never disappoints and without fail I hear something that I needed to hear. I am so grateful for the inspired leaders of our church that take the time to prepare these talks. Conference is always such a testament to me that we truly do have a living prophet that receives inspiration from God on our behalf. What a beautiful blessing that is. It also doesn't hurt that Conference means we get to snuggle up on the couch in our pj's with delicious food. My mom always makes yummy food for us to eat while we watch. We had so much food it was ridiculous. This year she did caramel and chocolate fondue. What's better this time of year than apples and homemade caramel? We also enjoyed walking outside in the beautiful weather, painting pumpkins, and just spending time with each other. Byron FINALLY had a tiny breather from school and it was especially nice to have him around. It gave me just enough to make it through until his next breather. Me and Tatum are so grateful for all of his hard work, but we sure do miss him when he's gone. 

A sleeping babe..

I have probably one million pictures of Tatum sleeping in my arms. I just can't get over how peaceful and sweet it is. And how lucky I am to be a mom and have this sweet girl in our family. It seems like days can get crazy but those quiet moments rocking her just makes the whole world stop for a few moments. I just love every second of it and soaking it all in for as long as I can.

Also this weekend we went to Layton to be with my family. I love going to Layton and always look forward to the weekends  that we go. Me and Tatum went to Justin's football game and we bought Tatum cute little baby beanies since the weather has finally turned fall-ish. Why is everything so much cuter in baby size?

Don't you love my baby talk face? Super attractive, I know.

Can you see why I want to buy her all the toys in the world. Look at that smile! (And that comb over...) 

The Past 3 Months Recap

So I realize that I am WAYYY behind on blogging. So I'm going to do my very best at recapping the last few months. First of all can I just say I absolutely LOVE being a mom. It has been so sweet to watch Tatum learn and grow. I can't believe that she is already three months old. She literally makes me smile every. single. day. She is such a happy baby and it makes it very difficult to ever have a bad day when she's always got the biggest grin on her face. My most favorite thing ever is that she knows her mama. She will follow me with her eyes wherever I go and will smile at me when I walk into the room. It is such a rewarding thing. 

I pretty much do all the things you're not supposed to do with your baby. I rock her to sleep a lot of nights. I let her sleep in my bed with me sometimes (okay a lot of times). But those are seriously my favorite things in the whole entire world. And I'm seeming to manage okay with the sleep I'm getting so I use that as my excuse. I'll put her down around 10 pm and she will sleep until around 3 or 4. When she wakes up for that first early feeding I lay her next to me, feed her, and then just let her snuggle up and sleep with me until she's ready to get up again. Usually it results in a kinked neck or shoulder for me but I wouldn't have it any other way. Should I put her back in her bed... probably... but like I said, those are the times I will cherish forever. Plus I know that I don't get them for long.

She is just starting to figure out what her hands are. It's hilarious because she will just sit and stare at them, like fascinated. I love that the world is all new to her. She loves being outside and we go on walks every day. You can tell that she's just taking it all in, the trees, the sun, the sky. She also found her vocal chords a few weeks ago, which results in her cooing and babbling for the better part of the day. Boy do I love those conversations, if only someone could see what a fool I look like baby talking to her. She can now roll over from her tummy to her back and also sit up in her bumbo. It kills me how fast this is all happening. I love love kissing her whenever and wherever. I'm constantly kissing her squishy cheeks and "french" kissing her (that's what I call it since every time I kiss her lips she's trying to eat me). 

It's also so sweet to watch Byron being a dad. He is the best dad ever. He has been so involved and helpful with her since day one. Even when she was teeny tiny and did nothing but eat, poop, and sleep, he still wanted to hold her and loved every little thing she did. He is so sweet and gentle with her and I know he loves her more than anything. She definitely has him wrapped around her finger. I couldn't have picked a better person to share my life with and raise a family with. Tatum and I are so lucky to have him.

This little girl has brought more happiness into our lives than I could even describe. She makes every day more meaningful. It just feels like she's always been a part of me, like I always knew she was mine. Everyone would always say to me while I was pregnant, "Enjoy you're life now because it will never be the same once you have her". Yes, they are right, my life will never be the same. But I never want it to be the same. Now that I have her I can't imagine even going a single day without her. She truly has filled a place in my heart that I never knew was empty.

These are of Tatum exploring the outdoors, her facial expressions are priceless.

She's around 3 months in these ones. 

Tatum one month old.

Bad quality, but this is Tatum's very first time smiling, it completely melted my heart. 

She LOVES getting in the bath. She always tries to eat the water. 

Favorite picture ever. These two have my heart. 

Tatum's blessing day.

On our way to St. George when she was 6 weeks old. 

Ha ha ha baby stretches are the BEST!! 

This is her discovering her hands. 

She loves watching TV, especially football. It's hilarious. She just sat and watched the BYU vs. Utah game with us and stared at the TV. 

After driving to my parents house I got out to get her and found her like this. Sometimes your headband can double as a sleeping mask. 

She has the craziest hair I've ever seen. We die laughing at her bed head. 

That was a million pictures but like I said, I'm trying to catch up. The crazy thing is that this isn't even a third of all the pictures I have of her. Hopefully I can be more consistent with posting from now on.